Garry Meier

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday, May 25

Garry wants you to place bets on which will disrupt the lives of Chicagoans more: new toll roads or an enormous leather convention. Chaps,...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday, May 24

WGN is cleaning out its offices and moving every last box of junk up to the 7th floor of the Tribune Tower, and Garry's found some fun stuff...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday, May 23

Garry tries to scare you out of going in Lake Michigan ever again. Meanwhile, pot dealers are falling into potholes. What is the world...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday, May 22

Garry tries to decide which is more ridiculous: Facebook's censoring of a woman's surgery scars, or kids with earbuds smoking more pot.

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday, May 21

Some McDonald's customers are drunk, disgruntled, and breaking more windows than the NATO protesters, but at least none of them have to...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday, May 18

Garry's got cops in the wrong places, an absurdly-expensive radio alert system, and the possibility for fistfights and riots (at the game,...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday, May 17

Horses can recognize the sound of their owner's voice, and we learn about the stupidity of sugar binging. Will the rock-throwing street...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday, May 16

A guy in New York asked his friend to shoot him in the leg, but Garry points out that in Chicago you may not even have to ask. People are...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday May 15

Tennessee's trying to cut down on the discussion of carnal knowledge in schools? That's funny, 'cause you can tie the knot at sixteen...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday May 14

It's NATO week, baby! The city's got plans in place for assassins, lone gunmen, and car bombs, but that won't stop the Beach Boys from...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday May 10

Japan is facing a number of energy issues and to encourage people to cut down the usage of using air conditioning, an underwear company...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday May 09

A man who drove three blocks with his children in his car while strapped to the hood of his car, has been arrested with driving drunk....

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday May 08

While we have been sleeping, the Russians came up with a roller-coaster where the arms can move in different directions allowing for...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday May 07

There is now a dating website for inmates in prison where they can post their hobbies and what they like to do. Would these people be could...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday May 02

Five "anarchists" wanted to blow up a bridge in Cleveland and start some trouble while NATO was in Chicago. Take a look at the mugshots...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday May 01

There should be more paper work before you kids after the woman known as "Octo-mom" has filed for bankruptcy and now she will try to earn...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday April 30

Forty train enthusiasts spent one hundred dollars each for a CTA tour to help raise money to reserve old "L" trains, but it derailed...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday April 27

A Californian man who holds a record with a bullet in his head has died at the age of 103. He lived 94 years with a bullet in his head, but...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday April 26

A Swiss woman starved to death as she tried to exist on nothing, but sunlight. Good luck living on only sunlight in this city, especially...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday April 25

A man in Sweden undergoes a lung operation, but he wakes up during the operation. He can feel every single cut in the procedure as he...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday April 24

A woman driving while intoxicated slammed into a police truck used to test drivers drunkenness. The police van was there to deal with...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday April 23

A man borrowed a van from a friend, but he doesn't return it for several days which prompted the owner to call the police. Police noticed...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday April 20

The Cubs are on their way losing their sixth game in a row. At their current record of 3-10, they had their fourth worst record to begin...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday April 18

Time Magazine has released it’s 100 most influential people in the world list. On the list: Pippa Middleton. If Garry had her looks, he...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday April 17

Happy Tax Day! A man in San Diego was given a ticket for running a stop sign, but instead of paying off the $400 ticket, he composed a a...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday April 16

Getting married soon and you want to lose some weight to fit into your wedding dress? Garry suggests you go on the diet K.E. diet where you...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday April 12

Two jamooks were arrested for stealing money from ATM machines using a device called a "skimmer," to obtain passwords to gain access to the...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday April 11

Williams Balfour, accused of murdering Jennifer Hudson's mother, brother and nephew, ultimately has no chance of winning after the jurors...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday April 10

Airliners are now mixing up their frequent flier rewards program such as receiving free socks three times a year. Fly the 720 Dreamliner...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday April 9

How about this for curing your hangover: There is a bus in Las Vegas called "Hang-Over Heaven" that hooks you up to an IV and supposedly you...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday April 6

A poll was taken from 2,000 woman of what their ideal man should have. If you can't change a tire or get ready in seventeen minutes, you...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday April 5

Opening Day at Wrigley Field is somewhat a Holiday in Chicago. Tom Ricketts believes this years team can turn it around, but after today'...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday April 4

It was Wrestle-Mania at an Ohio wedding when a drunk sister-in-law of the bride would not stop dancing with the groom. The two got into a...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday April 3

Kentucky fans react to their national championship win in basketball over Kansas by setting fires and flipping over vehicles. They were...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday April 2

A 30-year old man in Virgina called the police claiming he was shooting children at a school and proclaiming he had a pipe bomb. In the...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday March 30

With the lottery Jackpot now up to $640 million, there have been horror stories emerging from previous winners such as Jack Whittaker who...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday March 29

Google is changing its free food program for their employees with the mind-set of, "If employees are healthy, they are happy. And if...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday March 28

Dennis Rodman owes his wife over $800,000 in child support. Don't worry about him though, he has a top-less woman's basketball team to help...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday March 27

Spain's high-end hookers are refusing to have sex with the nations bankers until they open up credit lines to cash-strapped families and...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday March 26

A five year old girl was shot in her ankle after jumping on her bed when a firearm underneath it went off. This would make a great plot-...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday March 23

Facebook is warning firms there will be legal actions if they continue to have their interviewee's log on to their Facebook accounts to...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday March 22

Asians are the fastest race group in the United States and this was four times faster than the overall growth of the U.S. population. See,...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday March 20

The Walt Disney Company's recently released movie "John Carter" is expected to loss $200 million dollars which makes it the biggest flop...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday March 19

A Denver plumber is accused of stealing pipes and valves from public bathrooms, including hospitals, and cashing in on the parts at local...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday March 16

Are you filling out a NCAA bracket for March Madness? Well, last night Kansas State faced Southern Mississippi and while one of Kansas...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday March 15

Taste of Chicago patrons will have to pay twenty five dollars if they want to attend the concerts. Garry asks if that is too much to pay to...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday March 14

A Gettysburg National Military Park visitors' center bookstore has pulled a John Wilkes Booth bobble-head doll they were selling to patrons....

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday March 13

A marketing firm is turning homeless men into a Wi-Fi hotspots in Austin, Texas. Some say this in dehumanizing these men, but Garry got...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday March 9

Joesph Kony, a Ugandan guerrilla group leader head of the Lord's Resistance Army who abducts children for sex slave and to be soldiers,...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday March 8

A girl in New Mexico is suing her school claiming the staff humiliating her by public announcing she was pregnant to the entire school...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday March 7

Miss Seattle, tweeted before she was crowned, ""Ugh can’t stand cold rainy Seattle and the annoying people." Well, at least she did not use...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday March 6

Do you like your privacy, asks Garry? Well, you can throw that all out the window as some employers are asking their candiates to hand over...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday March 5

According to a new study, woman do not find beards attractive. Beards make men seem more aggressive and older. You mean woman did not...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday March 2

Sir Charles Barkley said twenty percent of basketball fans should be shot. Garry mocks Mr. Barkley by suggesting they should have a...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday March 1

A guy in North Carolina mistook a jar of gasoline for a beverage. He immediately spat it out, lit a cigarette, and he burst into flames....

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday February 29

A student at Streamwood High School gave birth in a bathroom. What happened to giving birth at proms? Is that old school now, questions...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday February 28

A Lithuanian engineer has come up with a roller-coaster concept where riders are thrilled and then killed. The Euthanasia Coaster is a...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday February 27

Instead of Garry speaking freely about how he felt about the Oscars, he decides to read listener Crystal's thoughts and nothing is off...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday February 24

Hundreds of people rushed a Foot-Locker at a Florida Mall in hopes of buying a limited edition pair of shoes by Nike and they had to be...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday February 23

After two sisters had a party while their parents were out of town, twenty thousand dollars were stolen from the house including narcotic...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday February 21

An Indiana state representative Bob Morris, feels girl scouts are dangerous. Morris believes girl scouts encourages sexual activities....

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday February 20

An ESPN anchor has been suspended for thirty days after make a racial reference towards New York Knicks newest sensation, Jeremy Lin. Garry...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday February 17

A plane with more than twenty pounds of marijuana was intercepted by F-16 fighters as it strayed into President Obama's helicopter's...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday February 16

One in twelve people in the United States are involved in an interracial marriage. Changes are happening every where one must suppose...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday February 15

A guy went through cardiac-arrest after eating hamburger at restaurant. that has 6,000 calories. Heart Attack Grill was the name of the...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday February 14

Garry opens up by showing how the city of Chicago is preparing for the G8 Summit meetings that will be occurring in May. This is much...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday February 13

Garry speaks about Whitney Houston's death and how the little known fact of her being found in bathtub is being barely discussed. Sony...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday February 10

Garry gives one reason why the Al-Qaeda might envy us: the introduction of a milk-shake by Jack In the Box that has a whopping 1,000...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday February 09

Garry lashes out on the fools who become prey to prize and sweepstakes awards that ultimately leads to a big scam. Garry discusses the...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday February 08

Garry discusses the recent city sticker design created by a fifteen year old, which is dedicated to firefighters and police, is currently...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday February 07

In today's opener, Garry starts off by mentioning a woman who gave birth on the freeway. The reason she didn't make it to the hospital was...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday February 06

It's the Monday after the super bowl and Garry wasn't entertained by the halftime performance, although he may have been confused by who was...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday February 03

Garry is absent today, so he allows the always eccentric Cliff to cover today's opener. Cliff gives us some pretty astonishing facts...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday February 02

Good afternoon! Can you guess what Americans favorite superbowl food is? Garry can answer that for you, plus he'll tell you why Ellen...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday February 01

Good afternoon! A recent survey says 91% of 28-35 year old's have used their phones in the bathroom. Garry provides some classy toilet humor...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday January 30

Garry talks about the first ever Starbucks to open in India this summer. Finally the people in India will have a place to work on their...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday January 30

Good afternoon! Garry gives germaphobes a reason to rejoice! Instead of using the bacteria ridden remote controls at select hotels, people...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday January 27

Good afternoon! Garry talks about unemployment and tells us what he believes the three classes in society are. Next, a $14,000 car is...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday January 26

The percentage of people in Illinois who own gun licenses has risen in the last year, license plate renewal fees in Illinois may be rising...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday January 24

Something's missing in today's opener...ah yes...Good Afternoon! A potential juror is being punished when he didn't appear for his...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday January 23

Shhh... Pope Benedict is asking people to take a break from the exasperating noise of everyday life and enjoy silence, but Garry thinks he...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday January 23

Garry's first story sounds too quirky to be true. A Chinese women remained naked on her toilet for over two years claiming a force was...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday January 20

Good afternoon! Garry feels Wednesday was a day that should be celebrated, as it was the first day in over a year that there were no...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday January 19

Garry starts today's opener with a mention of an inmate at Guantanamo who was caught with an Al-Qaeda magazine in his cell. Garry has the...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday January 18

In today's opener Garry talks about a creepy update on the Italian ship that sunk. Apparently passengers said before the accident happened,...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday January 17

Good afternoon! You may have heard about the Cubs wanting to put a 75 foot electric sign in right field, Garry talks about this and why...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday January 16

Garry starts this opener by dissecting the unfortunate events and bad decisions that happened when the Italian cruise ship sank. The captain...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday January 13

Today's opener features a couple stories of bad moral behavior. First, Garry mentions an Ohio apartment complex landlord who posted a sign...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday January 11

Good afternoon! A barbeque restaurant used Facebook and Twitter to attack a customer who didn't tip her waiter. The customer says that she...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday January 11

Garry starts today off with a story of a seven year old boy with cancer who was granted a wish that any young boy would want...to blow up...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday January 10

Lovers of twinkies be warned, Garry's first story may be hard to swallow. The beloved company Hostess that has given us so many tasty...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday January 09

Good afternoon! A comic book of Archie featuring the first ever same sex marriage encourages Garry to pose as a priest for the couple. He...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday January 06

Garry takes a game show approach in asking the listeners to decide which stories they think are true and which are false. Garry's list...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday January 05

Garry opens up with a story of one woman's string of misfortune during the holidays. First, the women was at an ATM and had her necklace...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday January 04

Garry starts off today's opening with a story of a desperate police officer. A cop gave a woman a $132 speeding ticket and then later...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday January 3

Happy New Year! Garry introduces us to his very stunad of the year. A North Carolina man went to Walmart to pick up $400 worth of...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday December 22

Garry wishes everyone happy holidays! He salutes everyone who keeps the spirit of the holidays alive; whether it be decorating for the...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday December 21

Garry starts off today's opener with a story of a women who put $700 worth of Christmas gifts in her car, went back to shop in the mall, and...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday December 20

Garry first talks about how Chicago cab drivers are asking for a 25% increase in cab fares. A petition has been signed by 15,000 cab drivers...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday December 19

There are only six days till Christmas and Garry has a warning for everyone, you're Christmas tree may be making you sick! For those who...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday Decemeber 16

Good afternoon! Garry starts off the opener with a story of a Naperville man who was driving his Firebird down I-65 and got stuck under when...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday December 15

In today's show opener Garry talks about a man who was attacked by his ex-girlfriend with a mounted deer head when he stepped outside...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday December 14

Garry's first story is about a man who was trying to smuggle meth into the U.S. from Mexico. What makes this story unique is that the man...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday December 13

Garry talks about a study that undergrads at Keele University participated in where they found that swearing actually helps relieve pain. So...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday December 12

Garry starts off by mentioning an unsettling line that Mayhem, the guy from the Allstate commercials, says while strapped to the top of a...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday December 09

Garry starts off mentioning a statement released by Dotty Sandusky, the wife of the now infamous child molester Jerry Sandusky, saying she...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday December 08

Garry starts off this opener with a story/replication of a guy who stalked a girl after their first date went sour. The guys continuous...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday December 07

Garry starts off talking about the US drone that crashed landed in Iran. The highly advanced drone "Beast of Kandahar" as it's named, landed...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday December 06

Garry starts off talking about Rachel Shteir, who wrote the book The Steal, a cultural history of shoplifting. The holidays are a trigger...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday December 05

Garry creates an entertaining mock dialogue of two people from the new show, The Virgin Diaries. The premise of the show revolves around...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday December 02

If you're reading this, then Garry's first story may relate to you. 53% of 18-29 years olds go online merely to pass time, for adults the...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday December 01

Garry starts today's opener off with a story about the back door of a van opening on the highway. This may not seem like much of a story,...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday November 30

Garry first introduces us to Jesse Dimmick, a man trying to sue a couple he took hostage. He claims they breached an oral contract when they...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday November 29

Garry starts off today's show opener with a story out of Evanston. Starting this week offenders caught with 10 grams or less of Marijuana...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday November 28

It's the Monday after "Black Friday" and Garry has a slew of entertaining stories, including one of a lady who fell asleep behind the...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday November 22

If you think checking your phone and computer is too difficult then Garry's first story will brighten your day. Computerized contact...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday November 21

Garry mentions how the Pakistan Telecommunication Authority is trying to get offensive words banned from SMS text messages. "Offensive"...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday November 18

Garry's story's of the day include a store that sells crotchless thong panties for children, a teacher asking for money in exchange for good...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Thursday November 17

Garry has a couple funny stories involving everyone's favorite mode of transportation, flying. The first story is about a pilot locking...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday November 16

Garry mentions three stories in today's opener, one about an angry bum, another about a boy calling the cops on his weed smoking parents,...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday November 15

Garry asks what will happen to Moo and Oink now that a judge has ordered the public auction of the African American meat store operator?...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Monday November 14

Garry pokes fun at "squirmin" Hermain Cain who recently labeled Michelle Bachmann as "Tooty Fruity" ice cream and defines a man's...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Friday November 11

Garry broadcasts from the United Center for the Blackhawks game and celebrates Veterans Day by honoring the troops. Garry mentions Honor...

Garry Meier Show Opener, Wednesday November 9th

Garry talks about Hermain Cain and his conveniently forgetful memory. He also brings up Amy Jacobson and the irony of her criticism of Cain.

Garry Meier Show Opener, Tuesday November 8th

Garry discusses Alabama's new policy on immigration which prevents illegal immigrants from using electricity, gas, water or waste water...